Monologue #9

Good Day, Earthlings.

First of all, let's congratulate the blog. It is now "The Overthinker" and I am happy with the new name because it suits me very well. I do post many other stuffs here, recipes, travel log, monologue hence I describe it as my personal melting post. I hope you like it, especially the background there. I am surprised that I picked peach. I do not really fancy pink gradation actually and yea, it turns out to be quite romantic.

I am writing this post over my pre-depature to Jakarta. I will be boarding in the next hour and the weather here is not very good. Anyway, just wish me a safe flight will ya? And I wish I can tell you why I am going back to Jakarta. It is pretty private.

Many things have been going on lately. It has been storm. But I guess it ends now, perhaps? I don't know. I hope I am fluent in French or Arabic so that particular person does not have any idea of what I am writing.

I bet all of you have experienced what I am now experiencing, which is to fall for someone. Since last week, I was in cloud nine and now I am buried six feet under. Ironic right?

About this person, I cannot tell you much because I think I have embarassed myself much in front of him and I might have been making situation uncomfortable. But, he is older and he is a nice, polite man, I liked him, I cannot say more.

Our meeting was simple and that particular time, I only considered him nothing more than an acquintance, even simpler, a stranger. Untill, you know unconditionally I fell.

If you want me to explain at least a condition, I have plenty. But what attracts me the most is... He is mature and responsible. He's capable of taking care of others. But one day, I was just blinded by the triumph of 'all of these' (hand gesture is optional while saying this sentence) and simply take his virtue in another direction.

It hurts really. Knowing that actually things are going alright and BAM! Part of your brain just brings out the scumbag-hopeless-romantic outta you.

Now it takes time to recover. All I have to do now is avoiding miserable lonely time whilst listening to Adele and remembering all the stupidity. Believe me, you don't wanna see the list of the stupidity.

But I thank him for being there in these past weeks. He made me feel grounded, happy, and thankful. He made me get up early in the morning and put effort on selecting nice working outfits. I have not been feeling this foolish. Yes I have been fallen for a guy, but I think It could not be growing any more intense. And turns out I am wrong. So wrong.

It is a wonderful experience, falling for someone. All the frustation and all the perks. Well he has not seen the last of me yet, but this time I won't bother trying.

Anyway, girls next time, never take advice from boys okay. Girlfriend gotta stick with girlfriend.

And Did I tell you I am flying business class today?!